“Clear out the old because of the new.”

“A new year can begin only because the old year ends.” ~ Madeleine L’Engle, The Irrational Season.

Mark 2:22 NIV
And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins.”

It can be difficult for many of us to accept this truth in life–that for something new to begin, the old must come to an end. Perhaps that is because many of us have placed so much of our limited time, effort, and resources into those things that have now passed. But if we cling to the things of the yesterday, we will be unable to experience the coming tomorrows through anything other than the perspectives of the past.

When a movie ends, it is over. We will carry its memory with us, and we may use its lessons in certain aspects of our lives, but it is over. So it is with the many chapters in our lives; we must die to the old to give way to the new. And when one year ends, we can allow it to be over–there really is no need for us to carry around the excess baggage of yesterday.

We must work to live each day on its own terms so that we might make the most of the present time we have been gifted–for that is exactly what the “present” time is… a gift. And when today draws to a close, hopefully we will be able to put this past year behind us and place our focus on the next year, free from the worries, concerns, and uncertainties of the past, and open to all the potential and possibilities that lie ahead.

“Clear out the old because of the new.” Leviticus 26:10

Questions to consider:

Why do wo tend to carry our yesterdays into today? What effect does this have on our lives?

What is required of us to allow a year to end?

What are some ways in which you can help to ensure that your new year starts out right?

For further thought:

The object of a new year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective. Unless a man starts on the strange assumption that he has never existed before, it is quite certain that he will never exist afterwards. Unless a man be born again, he shall by no means enter into the Kingdom of Heaven.

~ G.K. Chesterton, Daily News

Leaders of tomorrow

“All grown-ups were once children… but only a few of them remember it.” ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery.

Ephesians 6:4 NIV
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Do you remember what it was like being a child? To possess the ability to play by yourself and let your imagination run free; to be carefree and content with life in its current form; to be yourself with truly no inhibitions and without a care in the world. If we do not remember what it was like… perhaps it would do us well to spend some time in reflection and observing children to help us refresh our memories a bit. And if we do remember… well then why not allow ourselves the opportunity to experience some of those positive qualities of being a child once again?

Being an adult does not mean that we can no longer allow ourselves to experience the wonderful qualities of being a child. For instance, many of my adult friends spend too much time worrying about life–their finances, their jobs, their houses and cars, their relationships. It is important that we fulfill our obligations and responsibilities; however, we can still do so with a cheerful and lighthearted attitude. Worry simply eats away at the potential happiness we could be experiencing in life.

We are here to teach children… just as much as they are here to teach us. Respect the institutions of life, but learn to relax. Be silly and have fun in life. Allow yourself to be who you really are. Learn to enjoy life and find positive in whatever comes your way. Good or bad–you are going to have to face it either way.

Allow your younger self to be free today.

Questions to consider:

How seriously do you take life? Do you allow yourself to have fun?

What is your definition of fun?

Why do our concerns and worries often grow so strong in our lives?

For further thought:

“Children have a remarkable talent for not taking the adult world with the kind of respect that we are so confident it ought to be given. To the irritation of authority figures of all sorts, children expend considerable energy in “clowning around.” They refuse to appreciate the gravity of our monumental concerns, while we forget that if we were to become more like children our concerns might not be so monumental.” ~ Conrad Hyers

Find happiness in your own blessings

“Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own.” ~ Unknown.

Matthew 25:21 NIV
“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’

I do not think I would refer to it as an art, but rather as a sickness or curse. When we begin to look at other’s blessings with jealousy or envy–their lot in life, wealth, possessions, good fortune–we curse ourselves to living a life of negativity filled with discontentment, unhappiness, lack of satisfaction, and so much more.

The way we look at others is usually a reflection of how we feel about ourselves–how our lives are going and our feelings inside. Having jealous or envious feelings towards others, or believing negative things about them to justify one’s own perceived failures or lack of success, is unhealthy for our mind, body, and spirit.

When counting your blessings… remember to keep the focus on you. There are so many things to be thankful for that are simply overlooked or forgotten when we concentrate on the blessings of others, and doing so only serves to diminish the blessings right there in front of us.

Find happiness in your own blessings today.

Questions to consider:

Why do many of us spend so much time counting others blessings or comparing ourselves to others?

What purpose do such actions serve?

What are some ways we can focus more on our own blessings and less on those of others that seem better than our own?

For further thought:

“Happiness is an inside job. Don’t assign anyone else that much power over your life.” ~ Mandy Hale

Say grace for something other than a meal

“Grace isn’t a little prayer you chant before receiving a meal. It’s a way to live.” ~ Jacqueline Winspear.

John 1:16 NIV
Out of his fullness we have all received grace in place of grace already given.

Saying grace before a meal is a wonderful way to reflect upon the fact that we are blessed to have food before us to eat–for there are many who do not. Yet grace is even more… it is an attitude of gratitude… it is a way to live your life showing appreciation and thanks to God and to others. It is the knowledge that everything we have and every day we live is precious, and that nothing lasts forever.

I awoke this morning to find a whole day ahead of me… of this, I am thankful. I have eaten today… of this, I am thankful. I am not sick, can function, and enjoy relative health… enough so to play hockey today… of this, I am thankful. I received a paycheck recently… of this, I am thankful. I had the opportunity to tell my wife and children how much I love them today… of this I am thankful.

Every time I allow myself to feel gratitude for the infinitely many gifts in my life… they become that much richer. Say grace before your meal today… and then say grace seventy times seven times more.

Say grace for something other than a meal today.

Questions to consider:

Is thankfulness dependent upon others or could it truly be a way to live?

Do you pray before meals? If so, why?

What are some things you could say grace for right now?

For further thought:

“Thanksgiving Day is only our annual time for saying grace at the table of eternal goodness.” ~ James M. Ludlow

The sweet fruits of our labor

“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.” ~ Aristotle.

1 Corinthians 3:8 NIV
The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor.

Now is a good time to reflect upon our patience as another year ends. With the new year approaching, most likely we are thinking about goals and things we would like to accomplish this coming year, as well as reflecting on our accomplishments and shortcomings of the past year. Often times, however, there seems to be a sense of urgency to achieve our New Year’s resolutions and to make the changes in our lives that we wish to see. We must remember though, that no one changes in a day… it often takes a lifetime.

If we wish to partake in the “sweet fruits” of our labor, as Aristotle puts it, we must patiently endure the time it takes to season, grow, and flourish. In all honesty, nearly every meaningful change I have made in my life that has had lasting value has taken time. And although I have not always been as patient as I know I should have been, I have slowly come to understand the important roles that patience plays in my life.

This new year, be patient with yourself. Come up with a plan that lays the foundation and groundwork upon which you will build, and then take each step in stride as you place your trust within. You will not be a completely different person next week, but if you make a resolution to begin the process of change, and adhere to it with patience and diligence, in time you will begin to experience the positive changes that you desire happening in your life.

Reflect on some of the positive changes that have occurred in your life and how they have helped your grow.

Questions to consider:

What are some of the changes you would like to make in your life? Do they have to happen by tomorrow?

What are some of the processes you will need to go through to make those changes?

How can you start the processes necessary to begin on your journey?

For further thought:

“Two things define you: Your patience when you have nothing and your attitude when you have everything.” ~ Unknown

Seek for gifts that often lie obscured behind the tragedies that have occurred in your life.

“If we could see that everything, even tragedy, is a gift in disguise, we would then find the best way to nourish the soul.” ~ Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, Soul Gifts in Disguise.

1 Kings 17:20 NIV
Then he cried out to the Lord, “Lord my God, have you brought tragedy even on this widow I am staying with, by causing her son to die?”

Life brings to us many things, most of which mirrors the attitudes we embrace. Some come disguised as gifts, while others, however, come as something that does not appear to be a gift at all, yet often bring to us things that turn out to be very important and necessary in our lives. I generally have found that many of the things that seem awful, turn out to be the best things that could possibly have happened–but that the benefits are only available to me once I am able to find acceptance, growth, and learning from them.

Throughout my life, I have been witness to many instances of hardships, suffering, and adversity that other have faced, not to mention the innumerable tales I have heard from others. Even in my own life, I have experienced things that have challenged my trust in life and in others. And yet, when I go back later to review these stories and experiences months or years down the road, I consistently see something positive in them, something good emerging from the tragedy. People who have been diagnosed with a terminal illness and have found a deeper understanding and purpose in life; people who have lost their jobs or their homes, only to find that their newfound freedom from the bonds of those things has become a wonderful gift of starting over. Yes, some things are painful and some things are tragic, but when we distance ourselves from them, we diminish an important and fundamental opportunity to learn and to grow from them in ways that are necessary for us to move forward and live our lives to the fullest.

What Elisabeth is getting at is that everything in life is a gift; which, if true, should inspire us to open our hearts and eyes wider to the many things that we need to experience and learn from, things that we are perhaps blind to in our current situations or state of mind. Eric Clapton struggled for years with drug addiction and at one point was even hospitalized. In addition, he lost his good friend Stevie Ray Vaughan and two of his road crew in a helicopter crash, and later that same year lost his four-year-old son, who fell from the 49th floor of a Manhattan high-rise–the grief from which spurred him to write, “Tears in Heaven.” He overcame all of this to become a new man, a stronger man.

Tragedy and grief will be a part of our lives; and although it is much more pleasant to learn in ways that do not involve pain and mourning, the opportunities for growth and learning are there nonetheless–through the grief, the anger, the denial, the bargaining, the depression, and hopefully the acceptance. It is up to us whether we recognize the gifts in such situations, and if we keep our eyes, hearts, and minds open to possibilities instead of closing them off, then we can help our spirits to grow and expand into a state of stronger love, deeper awareness, and unrestrained compassion.

Seek for gifts that often lie obscured behind the tragedies that have occurred in your life.

Questions to consider:

Why do we tend not to see the gifts that are inherent in the disasters of our lives?

What do you learn the most from–the obstacles or the easy times?

How might we help others who have gone through hard times to see the gifts that those hard times might have brought them?

For further thought:

“Adversity, if for no other reason, is of benefit, since it is sure to bring a season of sober reflection. People see clearer at such times. Storms purify the atmosphere.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher

Merry Christmas! Let the spirit of love fill you and those you care about in life.

“What is Christmas? It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future. It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace.” ~ Agnes M. Pharo.

Isaiah 9:6 NIV
For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Christmas is all of these things: it is tenderness about our past relationships and experiences; it is courage for the challenges we are facing in our lives and a reminder that there are others here for us, as well as others who need us, at this very moment in our lives; it is hope for what lies ahead in our lives–that things will work out for the best and that our spiritual, emotional, physical, and intellectual harvests, will always sustain and nourish us. And above all, it is “a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings,” which is perhaps the most beautiful summation I have come across for the whole of the Christmas spirit.

For many of us, this season has been–and always will be–about wishing good for others, about doing what we can to make their lives a bit more joyful, peaceful, and rewarding. And while we generally tend to focus on the material aspects of giving during Christmas, even these gifts come carrying the message: “I am thinking about you and I wanted to do something for you.”

Of course, it is easy for us to be turned off by the commercialization of the holiday or to become so focused on what we want as gifts for ourselves that we neglect putting too much thought into what we give. And for those of us who are Christians, it can be easy to get so caught up in the religious aspects of the holiday and forget about those around us who do not necessarily share those same beliefs that Jesus was more than just a good man. But as we are gifted with the blessing of experiencing another Christmas Day here on Earth, it is rewarding to allow our thoughts to dwell on the wishes of prosperity, happiness, and peace that we hold for others, for while we cannot necessarily provide all those blessings for others ourselves–no matter how much we may want to–the positive thoughts that we have for others are blessings in and of themselves.

This Christmas, I wish you peace and joy; I wish you all the best of love, and I wish for you a rich, full, and fruitful life filled with many plentiful blessings. And most importantly, I wish for you the ability and the willingness to see those blessings, recognize them, and truly appreciate them while you are able.

Let the spirit of love fill you and those you care about in life.

Questions to consider:

What are some of the positive wishes that you have for the others in your life? Have you shared those wishes?

What happens if we get so caught up in the presents and the preparing and the chores that we neglect to consider the meaning behind the day?

When will you take time to yourself today–even if only five or ten minutes–to consider the blessings that are in your life, and the blessings that you wish for others?

For further thought:

“Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as opening our hearts.” ~ Janice Maeditere

Kindness

“Raise your words, not voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” ~ Rumi.

Galatians 5:22 NIV
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,

How often do I find myself yelling at my children out of anger or frustration? Too often is the answer. I do not like it when others yell or raise their voice at me, yet time and time again, I feel it is necessary to do so myself just to get my point across. But as Rumi states, “it is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” It is not my booming voice, my harsh or foul language, or the frightening tone of my voice that will best grow others, but the nourishment of my words. I can best teach my children through compassion and love, with thorough explanations, illustrations, and instruction, and by being a strong and positive role model and example in their lives.

Each of us has the capacity and the ability to spread kindness and love. However, having the ability to do so and actually doing so are two separate things. Of course, sometimes we forget–we get too busy or are preoccupied with other things on our minds–and we put kindness and compassion on the back burner. For this reason, it is important that we try our best to remind ourselves throughout the day. Carry a reminder in your pocket. Ask for grace to be more compassionate each morning. Actively take notice of the reactions and expressions others have to your words. We are each called to love and serve one another with compassion, humility, and patience. And the more we are able to do so in our lives, the more “flowers” we will find have grown and blossomed within our lives as a result of our nurturing “rain.”

This world already has plenty of misery, suffering, and hate. Instead of adding to this negativity, bring more positivity and uplifting love into the world around you. Be kind to others… even if they are being rude to you. Help others… even if they have no time to help you. Give to others… even if they do not share in return. The choices you make determine the world you will live in.

Be kind to others today.

Questions to consider:

How many opportunities to be kind have you had today? How many yesterday? Have you taken advantage of these?

Think of some of the most wonderful acts of kindness you have seen… how do they make you feel? How did they affect others?

What effect does kindness have on you when it is directed towards you?

For further thought:

“Kind words are the music of the world. They have a power which seems to be beyond natural causes, as if they were some angel’s song which had lost its way and come on earth. It seems as if they could almost do what in reality God alone can do–soften the hard and angry hearts of people. No one was ever corrected by a sarcasm–crushed, perhaps, if the sarcasm was clever enough, but drawn nearer to God, never.” ~ Frederick William Faber

Cycles of the natural world

“All things grow, flourish, die, and re-grow. Life and death are continuous and fluid. Like the Sun and the Moon which die and are reborn, so do the seasons and all living things.” ~ Brandi Bates

John 16:21 NIV
A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world.

All of life is filled with seasons. Seasons of birth and newness, seasons of growth and expansion, seasons of maturity and understanding, seasons of giving back and sharing, and seasons of endings and death. And if we pay attention to nature and the world around us, we will notice these seasons–these cycles of life that we are all a part of–and we will come to appreciate the value and purpose they serve.

Spring is nice–the green begins to return to the world around us, the flowers begin to sprout and grow, the weather starts to warm and the days grow longer, the birds fill the air with their songs, the increased sunlight offers vitality and energy to the world around. But would spring be so wonderful if not for the fact that we are deprived of it for much of the year? The fact that we spend so much time without flowers, without the warm sunlight, without the smells of growth, and without the sounds of creatures out and about, is what adds to the beauty of spring once it arrives.

It is important that we experience all of the seasons of our life to the fullest. And although all things come to an end… an end, of course, is simply a new beginning. Accepting the seasons of life, and how they apply to our own lives, makes our time here on earth much easier, much more enjoyable, and much more comprehensible.

Take some time to observe the cycles of the natural world around you today.

Questions to consider:

What are some of the seasons in your life?

Why do we often times find it difficult to accept life’s seasons and let things go when their time has passed?

How does allowing life to move through its seasons in its own time and on its own terms serve to benefit us?

For further thought:

“I surrendered my beliefs and found myself at the tree of life injecting my story into the veins of leaves only to find that stories like forests are subject to seasons.” ~ Saul Williams

Allow goodness to flow from you

“You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you, and allowing that goodness to emerge.” ~ Eckhart Tolle.

2 Peter 1:5 NIV
For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge;

We all are tasked with discovering the goodness that lies within each of us… that innate, common decency we are each born with–the compassion and concern, the encouragement and building up, the help and assistance, the sharing of our joys and sorrows. This goodness is not something we can try to become. Rather, it is something, which once discovered, we simply choose to let out.

I have the power to change the world in positive ways. The goodness is there, I simply must recognize it, and then put that goodness into action. And even if I do not see the results of such efforts, each small act of goodness does matter, and perhaps may inspire others to share of their goodness. The positive I share with others grows… but so can the negative.

Instead of trying to exert our power in immoral, maligned, or selfish ways, we must strive to be men of character, and use it to bring goodness into this world. We each have an abundance of it… and doing so benefits all of us.

Allow goodness to flow from you today.

Questions to consider:

Do you recognize the goodness you have within?

What kinds of goodness do you share with others? What kinds do you keep?

Why does it take courage to be ourselves and to allow our goodness to emerge?

For further thought:

“Goodness is love in action, love with its hand to the plow, love with the burden on its back, love following his footsteps who went about continually doing good.” ~ James Hamilton