“The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen.” ~ Frank Lloyd Wright …
When I look back over my younger years–especially around the middle school age–I see periods of sadness–moments in which I felt unlovable and lonesome, confused and afraid. The best word I can think of to describe it would be “hopeless.” I felt hopeless that I would ever fall in love, and that we could stay together. I felt hopeless that I would find a job that would allow me to make enough money for necessities. I felt hopeless that my situation in life would ever get better. The problem for me was that I did not understand what Frank is saying here–I could not correlate this truth to my life. Nevertheless, there it was–so much of what was going on in my life, many of the things that were happening to me, were basically because of the ways in which I looked at the world–the difficulties that I faced and the sadness and despair that I felt. The hurt I experienced from others, often times came about because I believed that others would hurt me. And when financial problems came about, they were usually a result of my beliefs that financial problems would most likely always be a part of my life.
The people I hung around, the choices I made, and the situations I found myself in, all had roots in my attitudes and beliefs. Therefore, I cannot stress enough how important it is for us to recognize this dynamic so that we might examine our belief systems now–the sooner, the better. Some individuals get caught up in destructive relationships because they have always believed deep down that they were unworthy of someone better. And many individuals find themselves stuck in jobs they hate because, for some reason, they believe in their hearts that work is meant to be unpleasant and meaningless, or that they do not deserve a decent job with decent pay.
One important thing I want to mention is that we must not go blaming ourselves–after all, these beliefs are not necessarily our fault. As we have grown, they have developed, much the same as our hearts and lungs have developed–steadily out of sight. And just as we should not blame ourselves, we should not allow the negative beliefs to continue to disrupt our lives and harm us; doing so will prevent us from seeking growth and improvement in our lives.
Examine your core beliefs today. Find those that are damaging and then do the necessary work to replace them with positive ones. No one else will do this task for us, and procrastination will only make change all the more difficult. Remember, your life has the potential wonderful change! And once you “truly” replace the old beliefs with positive new ones, you will find that things are not the same; rather they are so much better. Now that you truly believe that you deserve good things in your life… the things you always wanted to happen will start happening. And now that you truly believe in your own abilities… the things you have always wanted to do will now be possible.
Take a minute to reflect upon a negative belief you may have… replace it with a positive one.
Questions to consider:
How do our belief systems take root? Are we in control of the process? Are they even our beliefs?
How could it be possible that our beliefs can influence what happens in our lives? Can they affect our actions and lack of action?
What would you have to do to actively change a belief that you have held, either consciously or unconsciously, for a long time?
For further thought:
“If deep down you feel unlovable, you will attract into your life those who are incapable of loving you. And even those who happen along who are very loving, will suddenly find themselves being unloving towards you. If you have a belief that the people who love you will leave you, then sure enough, it will happen. Over and over again. So you had better become aware of your unconscious beliefs. They are creating your experience of life. They are based on your past experiences, and mostly they are formed in your early childhood. As long as these beliefs remain unconscious, there is no way to be released from them.” ~ Leonard Jacobson