“It’s important that people should know what you stand for. It’s equally important that they know what you won’t stand for.” ~ Mary Hull Waldrip …
It is fairly easy for me to let others know the things that I stand for. Perhaps this is because many of the things that are acceptable to me are also acceptable to those in my life. The things I find unacceptable, however, tend to be things that do not necessarily always line up with the beliefs and values of others. And for this reason, I must be certain to share my standards with those in my life so that they do not step on them.
To share our beliefs and values with others, we must first understand what we feel, and why. This clarity is an important element of taking care of ourselves by letting others know how we wish to be treated; they quite simply have no way of respecting us in ways that align with our standards unless we share those standards with them. For example, if I do not accept being spoken to or treated a certain way by others, then I have to tell them. The standards I set in my life are important to me, and it should be equally important that those I care about respect those standards as well.
When it comes to treating myself with dignity and respect, I must be willing to both set standards, and to share them with those in my life. Others will of course see some things in life differently than I do, and as long as I let them know how I feel, and do not expect them to see things my way, that is ok. Life is about treating each other with dignity and respect–it begins with ourselves, moves on to those in our home, and eventually is shared with everyone we meet.
Create a list of things you will not stand for.
Questions to consider:
How often do you share with others the things you stand for? How about the things you will not stand for?
What are some sensitive ways in which you might share these things more often with those in your life?
How might doing so positively affect your life?
For further thought:
“The traditional story will be recalled of the dinner-table, where one of the guests prefaced a salacious story with the common introduction, “Now, as there are no ladies present,”–when he was interrupted by Grant’s instant and effective comment,–“No, but there are gentlemen!” ~ excerpt from Ulysses S. Grant by Franklin Spencer Edmonds