When You Can Not Change It!

“Life is not the way it’s supposed to be. It’s the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.” ~ Virginia Satir …

Many of us try to change things in our lives to fit into our picture of how they should be. And when we encounter issues doing so, we grumble, we fuss, we complain, and we adopt a sour attitude. In addition, when we see good things happen to others, we often feel that those good things should be happening to us; and when bad things happen to others, we feel that those bad things should not happen to us. Sometimes we even get into rationalizing and justifying our reasoning by thinking we might deserve it and they certainly do not, or vice versa. But life is exactly “the way it’s supposed to be,” no matter how we feel about it. And no matter how bad we want to control it–the truth is that it is simply out of our hands.

Life does not progress by any specific rules. Rather, it flows much the same as a river does. If a river ever encounters an obstacle in its path, it simply changes its course. Likewise, if we attempt to put up obstacles or roadblocks to the flow of life in an effort to control things, then life will simply flow right around us as we stand a bit perplexed, saying, “This is not the way things are supposed to be?!”

The one thing we can do, though, is change the way we see things. The way we cope with life goes a long way towards determining what our own personal experience in life will be like. Quite simply, if life becomes difficult and starts to overwhelm me, then I need to slow down and ask myself if life is really overwhelming and difficult, or if it is simply my reactions that are making it so.

Virginia offers us a beautiful way to look at life–as something that ebbs and flows of its own accord. Once we can accept this truth, our lives become much simpler, much easier–for we no longer have any need to try to control the situations and outcomes in our life.

Accept the things in life that you cannot change.

Questions to consider:

Does accepting life as it is mean that we have to accept everything that happens in a passive way?

How do you decide the ways in which you cope with life?

Think of someone you know who deals well with life. Does this individual accept life as it is? How?

For further thought:

“Relax. Let every moment be what it is going to be. What is meant to be will come your way, what is not will fall away.” ~ Mandy Hale


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Filed under Commentary, Food For Thought, Living, Opinion

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