“The problem is acceptance, which is something we’re taught not to do. We’re taught to improve uncomfortable situations, to change things, alleviate unpleasant feelings. But if you accept the reality that you have been given–that you are not in a productive creative period–you free yourself to begin filling up again.” ~Anne Lamott …
Throughout our lives, the majority of us have been taught–or have picked up–the unhealthy idea that we must improve uncomfortable situations and rid ourselves of any unpleasant feelings we may have. This is simply not true. Doing so removes our ability to learn from those situations and feelings and to grow from them.
It is important that we are aware of the uncomfortable and unpleasant in our lives. We do not have to fill our lives with them, and soak ourselves in them like a bath, but we do have to become aware of them and confront them so that we can accept them and begin to learn and grow. Similar to attending a class in which we dislike the subject matter… if we choose not to read simply because we do not like it, we will learn nothing because we made the choice to learn nothing.
Out of sight and out of mind is not necessarily the best or healthiest attitude to take–especially when we are dealing with feelings and emotions that are caused by someone or something specific that will be a part of our lives for a long time to come. By avoiding acceptance, we effectively hurt ourselves, and perhaps allow our wounds and unpleasant feelings to fester and grow.
Spend some time in careful observation of your feelings today.
Questions to consider:
How can we work to better observe our feelings objectively and learn from them?
Is learning from our unpleasant feelings the same as holding on to them?
How can we come to accept them in our lives?
For further thought:
“Loneliness, dejection, the contempt or pity of people around you–these are unpleasant feelings. But they are precisely the things that produce genuine Dark Ones.” ~Sergei Lukyanenko